sorry for the silent treatment to all my loyal readers.. so very busy with work.. numerous reports due for month-end closing.. moving from very large space in 1 st floor to tiny crammed cubicle in ground floor.. honestly speaking, I just couldn't breath at this new surrounding.. temperature is freaking cold as if I'm living in Alaska during winter season.. so very open wide space.. no privacy at all! couldn't even 'mengular' or surf internet.. bosan!.. and this is kind of not final jugak.. I think our job is at stake.. not even sure if our services will be needed here.. ntah2 aku kena pindah kulim.. since locally assembled vehicle operation would be centralized there.. ntah2 satu company kena pindah kulim.. here would be HQ for motor division.. and filled with all stuck-up, phony, kiss-ass kind of people.. I just don't like this kind of culture.. simply bcos I don't know how to act around this kind of people..
maybe it's time for me to go.. do and explore different thing.. one thing about me.. I'm kind of afraid to go out there.. firstly bcos it's been a while since 'I jumped'.. secondly, afraid of not getting what I want.. afraid of being broken hearted.. hmm.. sometimes, it's hard to get what you want.. but eventually you'll get it.. that's what I believe.. from my past experience, GOD would shows the miracle way on getting what I want.. you just have to follow the right way.. not the wrong ones.. of course, it's easy to follow the wrong ones.. which probably consists of several different ways.. the right way might only consists of this ONE way.. the ONE and ONLY.. yes, it is very easy said than done.. I'd kind of experiences nervous breakdown here.. but I wouldn't want to show it to anyone.. some people think there is something interesting happened in your life.. and that kind of thing shows on yourself.. i.e. pretty face, happy.. really? I don't think you can trust that 100%.. here is the tips.. for myself, it's usually the other way around.. between sad and happy.. if I show happy face too much, there must be something bad happen to me but I kind of managed to put it aside.. but if you see me kind of sad, I'm probably happy with something.. seriously! I'm not lying.. I'm kind of scared to be over-happy bcos scared that I would crushed the next day.. things like that.. I'm afraid that I will jinxed the whole happy/sad thing.. that's why I chose to be in the middle.. mellow and show no emotion.. that's perfect.. that's why I'm stone.. bcos some people think they can simply judge ourselves from whatever emotions show outside.. I think you'd been fooled.. now I do understand why some people so curiously to get to know me in depth.. which I feel kind of bizarre.. bcos honestly, there's nothing interesting happened in my life.. just normal little things which I'm not intended to tell the whole world about them..
well, this is not what I intended to blog about.. I'll continue later on updates..
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